The Adult Child struggles to sleep

It's late at night and I cannot sleep. My mind is doing that thing were it comes up with numerous ideas. Ideas for a vlog, ideas for a movie/TV show, ideas for a children's book/comic. My mind is also doing that thing where it knocks down every idea it comes up with. Kind of like bowling. The ideas are the bowling pins and self doubt is on a roll. Taking down as many pins as possible. Ugh! I hate bowling. I'm nowhere close to good at it. I'm nowhere close to good at any sport or game and it is for lack of trying. I do it, I suck, I go "it's not for you jo, let's get some food". 

I remember one day, I was at church, the teens church. They were going around getting people to say what they were talented at. As it started getting to my turn, I started to have a mini anxiety attack. What was I going to say? I'm not talented at anything!! Wait, but I can sing now. Ehn, but I'm no WhitneyBeyonceMariah so I can't claim that as a talent, that's lying. Dance? Please, I get out of breath after 10 minutes! Next!!!

I'm so unfit

 Draw/sketch/paint? I was not the best in art class. Talk? Come on, what kind of a weak ass talent is that? Toddlers can talk. Can't play a musical instrument, I'm not a science whiz(is it still cool to use this word? Haven't seen it around in a long time).

Depressing something

So there I was, the teenage adult child with no real skill or talent.
I've had that sort of conversation with myself each time I've had an idea. There was the time I wanted to do a video series about my life as a Nigerian student in Ghana. Tell people about the wonders of Waakye and how Azonto sort of made us(Nigerians and Ghanaians) more friends than frenemies. Discuss the root cause of the love -hate relationship between the two countries. Then there was another time when I thought about doing a podcast called "What's up with that? " where I'd talk about things that beckon the question "What's up with that? " e.g "Applauding in non applause required situations" Air planes, movie theaters, what's up with that? ". I thought I'd be an okay TV presenter one time. I host shows with myself and my mirror all the time. Then I thought I'd be an awesome radio presenter. I love listening to music and talking about music and pop culture and what not. Had some movie ideas too. By the way, I'd like the film studios to know that it's  high time someone did a biographical movie about Queen Amina or any other important figure from our history books. Also, can we get a movie about Fela please? Before Hollywood beats us to it. 

Voice in my head is like: "Nobody cares about that." "That's not going to work." "You can't pull that off. " "That's a stupid idea. " "What makes you think people will see that? " "See your small bum bum" "Someone is probably doing that already and doing it better than you ever would" "A blog? Leave that for the writers, the articulate ones, the ones that have talents...or gist " "You're going to run out of content" "You know you're sensitive, you can't handle the mean critics" "You don't want people to know you think that" "It'll just end up as another abandoned project, why bother?" "You have no skill and no talents."

"Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good we oft might win, by fearing to attempt" - (William Shakespeare, "Measure for Measure")

The Adult Child struggled with an embarrassing situation

My latest fun thing to do is to roam around the internet, looking for fun or interesting videos to watch. One of my favorite places to roam is Buzzfeed. I roamed one day and found myself watching a video they did on Microblading. Watch the video to understand what it is.

 Apparently Microblading is the latest beauty fad.  I personally do not like make up. I was an adult when i finally let my Mum shave off...err "shapen" my eyebrows or the sparsely hair filled area that should be my eyebrows. She did it once and I let several people keep doing it because i cannot stand my eyebrows during the eyebrow regrowth period. I wear makeup now because that's what adult women do. That's what my Mum told me sha. Although I'm still very worried that it makes me look like a child would if she was wearing makeup. 

like this

 I've always loved the natural look, clear skin, a nice full set of eyebrows and eyelashes. No more pencils and filling in! Microblading seemed like it could help with that. 

I was roaming the other day,  Instagram this time. I happened upon a beauty salon where they do Microblading *squeal* I had already pictured myself assessing the results like the girl in Buzzfeed. I decided to give them a call to book an appointment.  They are located very close to my estate. The conversation went something like this:

Me: Hello?

Microbladers: Hello!  You just called our line so I called back.

Me: oh yes! I saw you guys on IG. Wanted to find out how much Microblading costs

Microbladers: sorry???

*i get this all the time, it's why i would rather send emails /texts but noooo Nigerian businesses (some) will never reply so I'm forced to endure the torture of phone calls*

Me: Microblading? How much is it???

Microbladers: 6k

Me: 6k?

Microbladers: no. 50k

Me: 50k??? As in 5...0???

Microbladers: Six! Six!  SIXTY K!

Me:

Me: oooh okay. How long does it stay on for?

Microbladers: well, it's supposed to last for 3 years but you will come for a refill... *i zoned out here. I went to my happy place. I'm very rich in my happy place*

Microbladers: hello? Are you there?

Me: yes. Okay. I just wanted to find out. Thank you.

Microbladers: so when are we expecting you?

Me:

Me: errr not now. I live very close so i can just walk in. Shey i can walk in or do i need to book an appointment?

Microbladers: well you can but you'll need to come early because... *zoning out* *1 million, nine hundred and seventy six thousand... 1 million,  nine hundred and seventy seven thousand... I'm counting millions in my happy place *

Me: yeah I'll come early. Thank you. Good bye

Microbladers: please what is your name?

I hung up and blocked their number.